Alright, I need some answers. There is one little issue that has been bugging me for a while now, and I feel the need to bring it to your attention - and hopefully someone will be able to shed some light on this quandary of mine. Let me preface this by saying I'm not so much mad at it, but rather genuinely confused, maybe I'm missing something??
Facebook status updates: What's up with the people who write "So and So is."
Jigga what? What does that even MEAN?
"Renata is." "John Q. Schmuck is." "Fill in the blank person IS." Seriously, is this a request for information or an attempt at seeming like you explore your existential dilemma and are introspective? In other words, are you asking the people who read it to add a noun or adjective that describes you after the "is", or are you just stating that you ARE as a person...which...kinda goes without saying, doesn't it? If you ask me, the former is a very sticky and precarious situation to put yourself in, because someone might interpret that as an invitation to unveil their feelings about you and write something like "________ IS a cheap bastard", or maybe "_______ IS a close talker" or even "________ IS the token ugly friend." Yikes.
But, on the flip side, if you're just writing that you "are" as a person, then perhaps you can do everyone a favor and spare us your cryptic BS status update, because frankly it just seems like something someone writes when they have nothing else better to say. Here's an idea - don't say anything at all, let's try that shall we? It's like those people who every single day write things like "Renata is going to the gym." "Renata just went to the gym." "Renata is getting ready to go to the gym." Capital D.U.H., no one cares. Unless something significant happened there, like you started a spontaneous dodge ball game with those 3 foot ab balls, or you got punched in the throat with a free weight, then I'd venture a guess that no one was dying to hear about it.
Additionally, when something happens that a lot of people are going to be talking about, I've learned that I should probably avoid signing onto Facebook because A- I have kind of a short fuse and B - I'm not that tolerant of the group mentality, in case you haven't noticed. Case in point: if I read one more Obama or Inauguration status update, I'm going to lose my effin' mind. YES, it's wonderful that we have a new president that is galvanizing a whole country and bringing people together. YES, we're all aware of how historically significant and amazing it is to have been part of the election of our first black president. And YES, I'm sure he will do great things and be the breath of fresh air we need, as will his lovely family. But NO, I don't think writing about it incessantly (on a decidedly UN-profound forum, by the way) is going to endear the experience to anyone further, it just makes some of us feel bludgeoned by the phenomenon.
This frustration is not Obama specific, it applies to things like the season premiere of "Lost", new episodes of "24" and the NFL playoff season. I swear I've heard at least 3 or 4 suicide threats on Facebook since the Giants and subsequently the Eagles have gotten knocked out. I'm passionate too, people, but email blasting your friends isn't going to change the outcome. This, in my opinion, is all a result of the increasing need for people to broadcast every last detail of their life over the Internet, which - let me be clear about this - I cannot condemn others for without first taking responsibility for it myself. Um, I mean, I keep a blog, for crying out loud, how much more "oooh, look at me, I'm so relevant" does it get than that, right? But that doesn't change the fact that with things like Facebook and now Twitter (WHAT THE HELL IS TWITTER, BTW???? I CAN'T EVEN BEGIN TO LOOK INTO THAT, IT'S JUST OVER MY HEAD...) we are giving people an unsolicited look into our weird little worlds, and sometimes perhaps it'd just be wiser and more advisable to simply close the shutters.
A friend of mine recently posted this, and I found this definition really amusing, it is a perfect description of what I'm talking about, said in a much more concise and clever way:
Myselfish - adj. A term used to describe people's need for recognition and self-fulfillment via the Internet. This is accomplished with incessant Facebook status updates and TMI-Twitter feeds, and serves the purpose of making one feel important and/or noticed"My friends consider my need to Twitter detailed accounts of my trips to Trader Joe's, the gas station, and my opinions on anything, really, to be annoyingly myselfish. I consider it shameless self-promotion!"
SEE??? I'm not the only one confounded by this. On a similar yet unrelated note, things this week that have also confounded me: why do little kids feel it's necessary to pick their noses and eat it? I witnessed it today and thing I gagged out loud *shudders*. Who was the first person to think of that, anyway?? UGH. Also, when did drinking out of juice boxes become un-socially acceptable? Because we need to bring those babies back for adult usage, they're freakin' brilliant and it's impossible to not feel happy when you've got a bendy straw hanging from your mouth.
OK, that is all for my late night ponderings, now if you'll excuse me I have to go post a FB status about my insomnia.
Still waiting for the upswing...