Where do I even begin?
Oh yes, first of all, in a supreme "F you, job market!" move I decided to wave the white flag and apply to grad school. Which I didn't tell any of you because I didn't want to mention it unless I got in... which I did. So that's the first update - I will be attempting to learn things again. Pray for me.
Update #2: Turns out the place where I'll be learning things isn't NYC, so I'll be moving. Yes, my sister and I are splitting up the club house and will be occupying separate domiciles. But, I'm pretty sure we'll still be on the phone during Gossip Girl, just from different couches. Oh, and we'll have to play paper/rock/scissors to see who gets the Hello Kitty calendar.
Update #3: I already found an apartment, because I'm awesome like that. In a supremely insane move on my part, I decided to wake up at 4:30am to take the train to Washington, DC (yes, that's where I'm moving and No I will not tell you what school, lest one of you is a stalker) where I lined up a jillion appointments with leasing agents in an effort to find a place to live. Then afterward I got a much needed drink with some local friends and headed back on the Infuriating Express (otherwise known as Amtrak) and returned to NYC all in the span of one day. My mom even agreed to watch my little baby nugget for me while I was gone - I don't know who was more tired that night, her or me. But, because I went all militant and OCD organization on that shizz, (I was a regular real estate Colin Powell, with notepad/schedule/highlighted maps, etc) I was able to secure housing for August. Yay me. The biggest difference between DC and NYC (other than the popped collars and boating shoes) is that most of the apartments had a washer/dryer in them, and I think I hugged/drooled over/ogled every single one of them. I would seriously commit murder for in unit laundry, I think I teared up several times.
Update #4: I landed a gig as a featured writer for another site!!! That does NOT mean I will be abandoning this blog (I wouldn't dream of it my little lamb chops!) but it does mean I will be allowed to sound off and blurt my opinion on another website, and this time it'll primarily be reviews of television shows and movies... and maybe the occasional op-ed piece. I'm sure this violates all common sense blog etiquette by directing traffic to another site that's not my own, but if you want to check out some of my ramblings the link is http://poptimal.com (the Entourage review is mine) - it's a pop culture site that has reviews written by every day snarky people, and not overly pretentious reviewers who write things that no one can understand anyway. A brilliant idea, if you ask me - but I'm probably biased.
Update #5: While I was slacking on my blogdom, there was a Little People convention in Brooklyn. No, I'm not lying - a real life, honest to goodness gathering of hundreds of vertically challenged people occurred and while I was wandering the streets of the BK with my own little person (but he's supposed to be tiny) I happened upon dozens of them. I spent about 5 minutes trying to figure out how to take a photo of them with my phone without seeming really classless and rude, and then decided it wasn't possible, so I refrained. You guys can probably picture it, just envision lots of short round arms and waddling legs - like the Oompa Loompas in Willy Wonka, only less orange. Or Hayden Panettiere, either one.
Update #6: I still hate all the kids on NYC Prep. Like honestly, I SEETHE every time I watch that show, and yet I can't stop. I'm seeking help.
So, yeah. There you have it, my last few weeks have been crazy, hence the extended absence. Other than that, I spent a delightful July 4th upstate eating myself into a steady coma, and just when I had recovered my family took a short jaunt to the Jersey Shore to visit some friends and ate ourselves blind once more. I may have to get a separate U-Haul for my move just to accommodate the size of my ass, I swear. Also, I realized that the shore makes me want to forsake my Italian brethren in favor of people who don't wear as much Ed Hardy clothing and hair gel. But now I'm back on my regular Mary Poppins schedule, and I'm soaking up every last second of baby-ness until I have to leave my little guy - a concept I can't even grasp right now. Like skorts. Or that 16 and Pregnant show. I'll be back soon with a blog posting that's actually funny, I promise. This one was informational, sue me.
Still waiting for the upswing...